


Sneaky Chicks And Snail Slime

by FanGirl_4Life_2020



Category: Buzzfeed - Fandom, Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: BAMF Shane Madej, Buzzfeed Test Friends, Established Relationship, He has him whipped, Hurt Ryan Bergara, Jealousy, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, Shane Madej Loves Ryan Bergara, Snail Video, aggressive flirting, shyan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-20
Updated: 2018-11-20
Packaged: 2019-08-26 14:09:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16683079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanGirl_4Life_2020/pseuds/FanGirl_4Life_2020
Summary: Based off the  "People Get Snail Facials For The First Time• The Test Friends"The blue haired insect lady was hitting on Shane point.blank.period.Shane wasn't the only person who was uncomfortable.





	Sneaky Chicks And Snail Slime

**Author's Note:**

> https://youtu.be/nMefkl0rv78
> 
> Here is the video, feel free to watch it and see where our ghoul boys were before it all began....

This snail woman has been throwing herself at his boyfriend since she got here.

Ryan couldn't blame her. Shane was perfect. A funny, weird sasquatch of a man with heart of gold and popcorn. (And excellent dick game, but he wasn't one to brag about their sex life.) He was attractive, yet awkward in all the best ways.

So Ryan put up with the cheeky remarks she gave him, thinking she was just doing a bit with his boyfriend for the video.

Still, there was only so much Ryan could take, but when she sat on his lap, he just shut down. He couldn't handle seeing the woman flirt with him aggressively TO HIS FACE. Instead he turned around to fidget with the other cameras until they finished with the outro. He looked up to find his co-worker Jen, standing infront of him,"I'm so sorry that happened, ry. I tried to stop it"

Ryan just sighed,"It's fine, she doesn't know so I can't blame her." He was okay, it wasn't like he was replaying the scene over and over in his head. Those were big, fat lies. He blamed her. He blamed her for world hunger, war, and global warming. That's how much he hated the snail woman.

Sure Ryan knew Shane wouldn't cheat on him, but it didn't hurt any less when women hit on him, especially if it was infront of him. Who was he to compete with all the beautiful women throwing themselves at Shane? All he could offer was childish adventures to haunted places, and he knew how Shane felt about ghosts.

And the way this woman was just shamelessly throwing herself at him; made him sick to his stomach. Speaking of the devil in skin tight black, she was sauntering over to Shane by the overhead lights. "Hey sugar, have fun with my little friends?"

Her appearance obviously startled him, causing him to bump into the light, barely catching it in time. Ryan couldn't help but laugh, his boyfriend was a clumsy idiot. Shane, collected himself and turned to address his company. "Uh yeah, it was pretty neat, gonna make one cool vid", he chuckled, scratching the back of his messy hair.

Suddenly she closed in the space between them, batting her false lashes and- pardon, Ryan just threw up in his mouth a little. He couldn't understand how such a smart ass like Shane Alexander Madej couldn't see what the hell she was doing? "Maybe we could something like this again, without the cameras... ", she suggested biting her lip, trailing her nails down his arm,"...unless you're into that kinda thing?". She pulled back with a wink, twirling her hair.

Realization struck Shane like a rock in a hard place. Ryan would've foumd his perplexity adorable if not for the given circumstances. His wide eyes, a gap mouth and to stop it all off the burning in his ears. He was immediately uncomfortable, backing away from her

"Ugh....sorry, but I'm actually seeing someone.....it's pretty serious" Ryan's heart swelled at that. Sadly, the words didn't deter her, that or she just blatanly ignored it. Probably the latter. "Well, I'm more of a stress reliever, besides...she doesn't have to know", he couldn't handle watching her press herself against his boyfriend once more and returned to his work.

"Wow, not only are you morally disgraceful. Your also soooo fucking wrong"

Ryan basically choked on his spit at hearing the words. Yes, Shane was never known to be soft spoken, but he was never this straight forward. Even though she did cross multiple boundaries.

The shorter man looked at his female coworker, judging by her saucer wide eyes, something was happening. Panic rose through him as he heard footfall nearing.

"Hey, Ry", he hesitantly turned around to look up at Shane, quickly glancing in the woman's direction over his shoulder. From what he saw she was still confused. Still he smiled,"H- hi Sha-", immediately he slammed their lips together, a large warm hand pressing against his cheek.

Shane's other hand had somehow snaked around his waist, cupping his bottom. God, were they really doing this infront of everyone! Still, he couldn't help melting into the kiss, arms looping around Shane's neck to pull him closer. Fuck. People were staring. He (knew) it. They were making out in the middle of set. God, Steven will never let him live this down. When they pulled apart, it took Ryan a moment to compose himself. Only a moment. "What do you think you're d- do- doing?", he yelped, punching his shoulder. (Ofcourse, it did nothing, but he knew the intent!)

The giant only shrugged, holding him again, smiling when he didn't push him away. Shane couldn't help but notice how his unbelievably soft skin glowed under the artificial lights. 'Guess that slime was magic.' "Don't act like you didn't wanna shut her up"

Ryan would never admit it, especially to Shane, but if he did (and he didn't) wanna shut her up; this would've been at the stop of the list. They both looked back at her with flushed cheeks and wide smiles, wrapped in each other arms. She look on her face was priceless.

The shorter man just threw her a smug look,"ahogate en baba de caracol, rompe hogares fallida"

**Author's Note:**

> If you wanna know what Ryan said, he said "Choke on slug slime, you failed homewrecker"
> 
> Hope you enjoyed the book! I didn't mean any disrespect with this story. This video just gave me a reason to write some bomb ass fanfiction!!
> 
> Comment if you have any story ideas.


End file.
